Yes!!! And omg it can feel so scary to do lol but every time I come away with a positive experience of it, I think it heals something in me and steadies my resolve
Oh my dear friend! As someone who you have risked with, I can say that your courage and love in doing so was a gift to me. It showed me how much you care about me and our friendship. It offered me a mirror to reflect on how I was showing up in the relationship, and how it wasn't aligned with my values and how I could change- from a place of love and care. It gave me permission to take up space too, and speak my needs and feelings. And it left me feeling closer to you than before. Thank you for sharing this beautiful essay, you inspire me on the daily <3
I knew I had grown quite a bit (and perhaps were on the right path, taking care of myself) when I took a risk, the person responded negatively and I managed to be; Okay, their loss. It hurt, and I did not shake it off as quick as okay their loss might make it sound like and it also closed the door to one of the very few friednships I have and that was also a bi scary part of it how it would take me down a path of more lonely then I already feel. Then again, I would rather keep my self company over someone who does not make me feel right...
I’m really sorry you had that experience. It sounds devastating. Loneliness is a really huge issue, and you’re not alone in that. Our culture isolates us toward it in so many ways. I think choosing to be a good friend to ourselves (even if that means limiting who we are friends with in the short-term) sets us up for more friendship and connection in the longterm. Doesn’t make it less painful though in the thick of it 💔❤️🩹
Loved this reminder, Ashley! My wife and I often encourage each other to consider what’s on the other side of shame—maybe rejection, judgment, hurt, but also maybe connection, understanding, love. 💕
yes!! there’s a generosity in teaching people how to treat/love us right—for the ones who are interested in doing that.
Yes!!! And omg it can feel so scary to do lol but every time I come away with a positive experience of it, I think it heals something in me and steadies my resolve
Such an important caveat!!
Oh my dear friend! As someone who you have risked with, I can say that your courage and love in doing so was a gift to me. It showed me how much you care about me and our friendship. It offered me a mirror to reflect on how I was showing up in the relationship, and how it wasn't aligned with my values and how I could change- from a place of love and care. It gave me permission to take up space too, and speak my needs and feelings. And it left me feeling closer to you than before. Thank you for sharing this beautiful essay, you inspire me on the daily <3
Love you so much!! I’m so grateful for the safety and warmth and joy knowing you brings to my life, and happy to risk it for our friendship!!! 💗💗💗
I knew I had grown quite a bit (and perhaps were on the right path, taking care of myself) when I took a risk, the person responded negatively and I managed to be; Okay, their loss. It hurt, and I did not shake it off as quick as okay their loss might make it sound like and it also closed the door to one of the very few friednships I have and that was also a bi scary part of it how it would take me down a path of more lonely then I already feel. Then again, I would rather keep my self company over someone who does not make me feel right...
I’m really sorry you had that experience. It sounds devastating. Loneliness is a really huge issue, and you’re not alone in that. Our culture isolates us toward it in so many ways. I think choosing to be a good friend to ourselves (even if that means limiting who we are friends with in the short-term) sets us up for more friendship and connection in the longterm. Doesn’t make it less painful though in the thick of it 💔❤️🩹
Loved this reminder, Ashley! My wife and I often encourage each other to consider what’s on the other side of shame—maybe rejection, judgment, hurt, but also maybe connection, understanding, love. 💕